The tiny tots and their emotions

Do you think only pregnant women have mood swings?

You want to see someone who can showcase more emotional changes than a oscar winning actor?

You think only your friend is a drama queen or king who acts to get hus or her thing done as his or her wish?

If the answer is yes for the above questions then it means that you have not been a dad yet or you don’t have kids at your home for whose actions you are primarily responsible.

Infants and emotions are like the waves in CRT monitor in the hospitals. They are never constant and they should not be (if they are , you should seriously meet a doctor). They always change based on their need. For example, my son wakes up a day with a beaming smile and on the contrast he might wake up crying loudly the very next day. But there are few emotions which are static like the excitement when we take him to his favourite place, but them their favourite toy or simply gifting them for their good attitude. Infact their life is quite tough as they don’t know to express what is there in their mind as adults and so they chose an emotion to fulfill their needs.

So how do we deal with the emotional ups and downs the infants showcase? Frankly telling you its always not easy to convince them but i have few tips:

1. Do not encourage kids to throw tantrum: Kids have the habit of throwing tantrums to get their needs fulfilled but encouraging that shall make them believe that its a solution to get things from us. So do not encourage them throwing tantrums.

2. Encourage them to be happy : When kids are in happy mood, they will be too much excited and do things which might irritate the parents but it should not be restricted as stopping them shall discourage them from being happy and make them fear of being happiness.

3. Be a friend when they are upset : Be a friend to your infant and gain their trust so that they open up to you about their problems. Its easy for the infants to express their happiness but its not easy to express when they are upset. Find ways to make them happy and come to normalcy.

4. Know the reason of their tears. If they cry for a reason try to solve it but its frivolous then try to divert them to something which can excite them.

5. Be an ideal parent: Infants learn to showcase their emotion from the parent. So we share the responsibility to teach them the right way to express their feelings and how to control certain emotions at places.

In the emotional roller coaster of the infants we might lose cool at times but its more important to remember that kids are the purest souls after all and they don’t know to fake their feelings. Its us the parents who have to learn the tactics to handle the little ones for the benefit of both.

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I was hearing a song from the movie ‘Bangalore days’ where the hero’s lover would sing a english song for him and at the end of the song, she dies in an accident. I just thought if the hero had to write a poem for her what it would be. The thought made me feel heavy and I guess the poem is impressive. Let me know your feedback.

Follow my writings on https://www.yourquote.in/shankar86kd #yourquote

Bedtime conversation with D

Bedtime conversation with D

It was bed time and the clock stuck 11. We switched off the lights. And that’s the time the world starts spinning for our 3.5 year old son ‘D’. Its a routine that serious (not so serious for us) starts when we go to bed after a long tiring day. We expect them to be tired as well but they behave the other way.

And to tell you more precisely the conversation would start from the word you utter and thats the trap. Yesterday the conversation started like this

Me : Gud night son.

D : Gud night Appa. But I am not sun. Sun comes in the morning and disappears at night. (Ah the kindergarden knowledge sharing)

Me : This is not that ‘Sun’ dear. It is S..O..N (I spell the word.)

D : Oh is it. Then we both are S(u)ons ah? (i didn’t know what he understood and which S(u)on he was referring to.)

Carefully I just say “Hmmm” without giving him a prompt.

D : Appa then chithi’s(aunt) son is Dhee. Am I right?

Me : No dear. Dhee is a girl and you should say ‘daughter’.

D : Why so? Why not son?

Me : In English the boy child is called Son and the girl child is called daughter.

D : (Confused) Oh is it. Ok. Then I will become doctor for Dhee.

Me : (Even more confused from where doctor came into picture) why doctor?

D : Ya i can’t be a daughter right. So I will become doctor.

Me : Ok guess you are feeling sleepy. Close your eyes now. Good night.

D : Appa you didn’t ask me what will I do when I become a doctor.

Me : ok tell me.

D : I will take care of everyone and so noone get uaah(in his language uaah means disease).

The proud dad in me smiled widely but to prevent more conversation and delaying the sleep time, I just give him Good night kisses and hug him to sleep.

Gifts – a token of love or value for money?

Gifts – a token of love or value for money?

“Hey dude, Happy birthday. Here is your gift.”

“Hey darling. How are you? Been very long since we met. I have got a gift for you.”

“Hey bro. Happy anniversary. Look what we have got for you.”

I guess from the above conversations you could easily guess what is common and also what this blog is about.

We have grown up in the culture of gifting not just today or yesterday but for ages. Yeah you heard it right. We have read that Sabari gifted lord Rama with the fruits that she had tasted already, Sudhama gifted lord krishna with the rice flakes when he met his friend after ages, our kings had exchanged lot of gifts that spoke the values of their kingdom and you see we gifted the kohinoor diamond to the Queen (that was a PJ 😛 ). In every household the gifting starts from the day we are born. Agree?

Now let me come to the point. What do you see when someone gifts you? The monetary value of it or the love the person has on us? Nowadays since we all have huge options and varieties, we go with pocket friendly gifts when we have to gift someone but yet we see to that it looks grandeur or atleast unique. But when we receive, we see the worth of it. We see the price, we see how useful or unique is that gift and more importantly we judge the person with the gift he is giving us. Aren’t we doing this?

Ok I can hear the readers asking that why this blog now. I got to overhear the conversation between two fellow passengers in my bus today and the ladies were discussing about the gift one of them has received which is the smallest in size than the other gifts she has received and the point she said startled me. She said – ” People haven’t developed since ages and are living in stone age as they still gift handmade not so perfect gifts to someone on their special day.”

But isn’t gifting to showcase to the receiver that they are in our hearts till the moment. I prefer gifting people something which I can do myself like painting, quilling or any craft. If you ask me why, I think that I can give the person whom I value a lot something which I can do investing my time and effort. Its easy to go and buy something from a shop but when I do it of my own it has my creativity with love.

So dear people if someone gifts you with something they have done by themselves, learn to appreciate because they didnt do a cool shopping for you in a mall but they put their effort to give you something special.

Cheers !!!

The promising rain

Waking up kids in the morning is a huge task. Do you agree? If they are school going kid and more particularly on a monday morning is toughest. Let me tell you why it’s tough first. You yourself would be in monday blues and when you go to your bedroom after your coffee to wake up your kid, they will be sleeping calmly and peacefully. The moment we brush their hair and call them with the pet name that we address, they shall give a cute smile and cuddle into you. In this cute situation who will have the heart to wake the kid up. And then after so many attempts when you make them open their eyes, we want our kid to wake up happily isnt it? 

That’s altogether another big process. We should have a script ready to make them feel excited to wake up. When some days Chota bheem helps us, other days some news about family or events at school or someone’s birthday. There are not to be said things too. 

Today being monday all the mentioned happened at my home too. I wake up to see that it had rained early morning. I thought this shall definitely excite my son as he love rains. So i wake him up telling the story of how it rained early morning and he gets excited. He wakes up fast and runs to open the window. I help him opening the window to see stagnant water at our apartment entrance and lushy green trees. He confirms with me if the water is due to rains or overflowing tank. I gave a promising smile and said it was because of rains only. 

I felt some sense of achievement but it was all for few micro seconds. The happy expression in my son’s face changed to sorrow one. I was completely confused. Hugging me tighly and with a sad face he asked – “Daddy, why does it always rain when I sleep?”.  A week back also it had rained when he had slept and keeping that in mind he felt sad and disappointed. I quickly had to gain back my energy and with a dramatic facial expression I said pointing my fingers to the sky “Hey you clouds, if you dont rain when D is awake next time god will punish you severly. ” Seeing this my son was super happy and proud. His prayer today also had request for rains when he is awake. 

And here are the rains now. Pouring heavily, making my son happy. I write this while I am waiting at the bike parking for the rain to stop and eagerly waiting to see my super happy son. 

Tales from my music diary – “Malargale malargale malara vendam”

It was a lazy noon at work. The lunch was showing off its results. Adjusting the nob below the chair to incline little to the back to have a feel of easy chair and take a power nap, I scrolled down the songs in my playlist. It was clear that I had been sticking to Rahman at day and Raja at night. I felt that the songs of other music directors where just quizzing at me asking “What happened today? Why coming to us?” and trying to escape from my sight. 

Feeling lazy to scroll, I just turned on the shuffle mode and plugged my headphones. The first song that played was my long time favorite. The song was “Malargale Malargale malara vendam” from the movie “Pudukottaiyil irunthu saravanan” sung by Bombay jayashree and music composed by Yuvan shankar raja. I quickly took my phone and switched on the ‘repeat this song’ button. 

The song starts with the sound created by walking in the water and I was taken to my college days when i have tried making the sound in rain water and singing the song. We shall spend our free time in my neighbor room listening to the new albums and this song did sprinkle the magic in me from the first time I heard it. I was addicted to this song to the level that even today closing my eyes I can remember my hostel corridor, the song playing in my neighbor room, the rain drizzle hitting my face and with tea cup in hand i hum the song along with my friend. The lyrics are still by heart. The lyrics on simple wishes, a happy-go-lucky lifestyle, a leisure talk with nature on a holiday,  leaves me amazed. Though its the heroine’s wishlist in the movie but I feel that it can be a simple dream for anyone. I remember how me and my bestie who loved music have spent nights at the hostel terrace, stone benches gazing at the stars and singing the song. 

The song keeps playing in the loop. I stare at my computer screen with some kind off happiness. Its not just people who can take you down the memory lane but music also does.

Cuddly cuddly sleep !!!

It was the second time in three and half years. I mark that night as one of the special nights. I didn’t sleep much that night. I was in my cloud nine and it took me some time to come out of the sweet shock and live the moment. 

Wondering what am talking about? It’s about my son and me cuddling and sleeping. Usually he doesn’t even come closer to me. He loves hugging his mumma and sleeping. I don’t know what happened that day. After his midnight course of milk, he came towards me calling daddy and hugged me and slept. The three year old son of mine has complaints about my beard which seems to irritate him when I hug him or kiss him. That day was an exception. He cuddled with me and murmured the words “love you daddy” which broke my sleep and kept me thinking if it was in real. 

I could hear him murmur in between about his grandma and grandpa. Guess he was dreaming about playing with them. He suddenly would go silent. I was just staring at the fingers that holder mine while sleeping, brushed his soft hairs, hugged him tightly because these things never would happen when he is awake as he is such a hyperactive fellow. Watching him lying down calm and quiet was really a boon.

This all lasted only for few hours and when he woke up in his sleep by early morning, he immediately gave a cry and jumped into his mommy’s arms. But I was still awake in amused…

Just a pose 🙂