Before the birth of the baby –
“Hey did the ultrasound results come good? Did you see the baby by yourself in the scan?”
“How many times does the baby kick in an hour? My grandson used to kick more than 100 times?”
“Are you getting enough sleep? Don’t lie down to your right, don’t lie on your back.”
And after the birth –
“How many times does the baby does potty? Do you check the potty color?”
“Does the kid take feeds frequently?”
“How long the baby cries?”
“Which pediatrician are you visiting? I know a top class one. Yours doesn’t seem familiar”
“Do you sterilize feeding bottle and pacifier everytime? It’s very important ”
These are few question which every new parent would have heard from the day the lady announces her pregnancy. Few brag about their experience while few threaten the parents with their worse. Sometimes the parents get a doubt if they are doing good or not. Everyone (even the unmarried guy or girl in your team) would have an opinion about the very minor doubts you have on child care.
My 5 tips for new parents:
Your friends and google are not doctors:
We normally tend to share our problems with friends but if you ask me, friends are not right people to discuss about your doubts on child health. They might have kids already and also might have faced similar situation as you but it doesn’t mean that they should be right and decide on what your kid is going through. Because they are not experts in the field. And never google about symptoms of child’s health issues as Google know only one illness and it is Cancer. So avoid googling for your own peace.
Avoid discussion on comparison:
Your neighbor’s kid might have pooped the next day after its birth, but it isn’t mandatory for your kid to poop the next day it is born. While your friend’s kid might have never cried at night, doesn’t mean you are sure to get peaceful sleep. Each kid is unique in its own way. Accept the fact. Allow the kid to take its time to do stuffs. People tend to give you reasons to compare but avoid the conversation. If you really feel your kid is lagging in something better discuss with your doctor.
You cannot be a 100% perfect parent:
Noone is 100% perfect in any task but we tend to go an extra mile as a parent and give 200% effort but even then I can challenge you that you cannot be 100% perfect all the time. You won’t be always sterilizing bottles or pacifiers, you won’t be always awake to change the wet diaper before its too long, you can’t take the pain from the shots given to your babies. You would miss the schedule once in a while and its totally fine. Don’t kill yourself with unwanted guilt.
Know what works for you :
Some brands of diapers/creams/wipes does suit few kids while they wont for the other. Similarly the supplementary food might differ to work with kids. Since the best brands works good for someone doesn’t mean that it should work for your too. Also some kids sleep listening to music while few kids won’t. Every kid is born with its own way of accepting and rejecting things. Know what works fine for you and your kid.
Take notes when you visit your doctor:
Before you visit your doctor, prepare notes on all questions that is running in your mind. Do not leave even a single one and manage to put through the questions to your doctor. Every doctor is responsible of hearing your questions and answer to it. And i know pedestrians definitely do itto new parents. Get all your doubts clarified before you walk out. Ensure the weight, temperature is always checked and also all vaccine shots are given on time.
Babies are the bundle that comes to us with lot of responsibilities and every one of us try to be the best to our babies. We sometime go beyond out limits in the name of care. Remember that babies are like competitive exam question papers. The questions and answers need not be same for all.
Enjoy your parenthood. Create memories.